Mindfulness and Children
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How often do you find yourself being more aware of what happened yesterday and what\'s going to happen tomorrow? Why are you not focusing on what is going on right now? This is preventing you from enjoying the moment and can be changed using the powerful techniques of mindfulness. This article will explain the concept of mindfulness and how it can help you in your daily life with your children.
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How often do you find yourself being more aware of what happened yesterday and what's going to happen tomorrow? Why are you not focusing on what is going on right now? This is preventing you from enjoying the moment and can be changed using the powerful techniques of mindfulness. This article will explain the concept of mindfulness and how it can help you in your daily life with your children.
Mindfulness is about being aware in the moment. Something that all parents could enjoy at times. Not only for themselves but also for the kids. Why do children wake up happy every morning with an immediate desire to get up and get the day started? Because they don't think about what they are going to do today and they don't worry about what happened yesterday either. They just have an appetite for life.
What is mindfulness?
Mindfulness is a tradition that is rooted in Buddhism and can be traced several thousands years back. In all its simplicity, it is about being aware of the moment as that is exactly when life happens. Life doesn't happen yesterday and tomorrow - it only happens today. This is a way of thinking that is incredibly important and useful when we spend time with our children. They are the first ones to feel, and to suffer, if our mind is not with us when we spend time together.
The ability to be aware of the moment when we are with our kids makes the time more enjoyable both for kids and parents. Especially as a new parent this is hard always to be present as we are constantly bombarded with things we could do better as new parents. We are told to do things this way or another way and we are often struggling to do things the way we are taught - instead of listening to our feelings.
How to apply Mindfulness in your life?
We have all tried those stressful mornings where the kids have to be ready to leave the house, but everything starts off at the wrong foot. You find yourself in the middle of a balancing act that can easily end up in stress and frustration. You need to get ready, get the kids ready, pack bags and get out of the house in time for school and work. One kid spills the milk and the other doesn't want to get dressed. The clock is ticking. You get stressed and irritated, the kids start crying and screaming and in the end you feel like giving up. By now everybody is stressed and grumpy - and late! Is it your fault or the kids? Who is creating the frustration? Are you trying to do too much at the same time? Don't worry - it happens to all of us.
In such a situation, mindfulness can be a great help. Here, it is all about letting go of all the things you want to do and end up doing half, which causes frustration. It is about creating focus. If you focus on one thing at the time instead of focusing on what comes next then you will be able to do things better and faster as you fully put your energy into what you are doing. If you constantly think of what you have to do afterward then you will not be able to perform well in what you are doing right now.
Mindfulness in relation to children is about looking beneath the actions and the words, and focusing on the needs, their intentions and their challenges in life. It is about watching the current situation and understanding what is the cause. Ask yourself the following questions; what feelings are at display and how can I handle it? What do I feel right now and what is my child trying to express? Am I not attentive or does my child feel misunderstood? Am I having an automated reaction because I think I am used to a certain pattern of behaviour? Does it feel like everything is on replay?
Mindfulness can be a great gift to the whole family. It is about being yourself, more aware of the now and listening to your intuition instead of remembering advice from books, magazines and relatives. Being a parent is one of the most demanding and stressful jobs you can get, and if you have another one on top of that as well, then you have a difficult task. Mindfulness can teach you how to maintain your focus and enable yourself to be better to handle the difficult moments in your daily life.
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