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One Sided Relationship, Attitudes That Promote a One Sided Relationship

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One sided relationships result from our own dysfunctions. 3 attitudes that promote one sided relationships.

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Love by its very nature is giving and centered on the other person but to be honest most of us think of it as desirable mainly when we are on the receiving end. We enjoy being loved and pampered by someone and if they do not require much from us and we are self centered enough then we end up in a one sided relationship. This is an unbalanced relationship where one partner gives significantly more to the other and if you look into the relationship it seems like the giver is in the relationship alone since their partner puts little effort into the relationship and functions effectively like a single person. So what attitudes promote a one sided relationship?

1. I don't deserve him. If you believe that you don't deserve your partner then you will tend to go overboard to ensure that he stays with you. Because you feel that you don't deserve him then you don't place any expectations on him to reciprocate loving emotions or deeds to you. It is enough for him to just look in your direction every so often and you are ecstatically happy. You just bask in his presence as he is so beyond what you deserve. You are committed and he is not as you have given them permission to be whatever they want. If truth be told you are more of a worshiper than a partner and your idol (god) doesn't have to do anything to win your devotion. He already has it just by being. A totally one sided relationship.

2. I am not enough for him. This is similar to the first one except that here your focus is on yourself. You are insecure in who you are and you think that you have short changed your partner by being with them. You genuinely feel that you are lacking in some critical ways so that however much you try you cannot make them happy. With this attitude you communicate to your partner that he doesn't have to be faithful and true to you since you are deficient. They can go out of the relationship to fill in your deficiency.

3. All men are horrid but necessary. If you have this attitude then you expect your partner to short-change you every step of the way. You thus go in already expecting the worst so you excuse all his bad behavior since that's what you unconsciously signed up for. You go into the relationship expecting it to be one sided and you know what they say; you attract what you expect. So you get a one sided relationship.

One sided relationships are actually about you since you teach people how to treat you. If you teach your partner that he doesn't have to be respect you or be fully committed to you then guess what happens with time; they learn the lesson and your relationship gets increasingly one sided.

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