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The Fear of Love

Author: Guest Total views: 25 Word Count: 953

Have you just said that there is no such thing as fear of love? Well, let me contradict you. There is, and there are in many who feel it, even if they do not even realise it!

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Have you just said that there is no such thing as fear of love? Well, let me contradict you. There is, and there are in many who feel it, even if they do not even realise it!

Have you ever wondered what keeps you awake at night, what makes you sigh when you see happy couples holding hands, why do you have tears in your eyes when you enter the door of your house and the sudden silence makes you hear the broken sound of your heart? No, it is not the lack of love from your life, but your fear of it, fear which will make you grow bitter, which will deceive you and tell you that you do not even need Love in your life, that you are fine on your own, all closed up in your shiny dark shell. 'See the dark colours inside it? They suit you so well! What's the use of going out of it and endure rejection, regrets, tears, shattered dreams? Stay in here, all warm and cosy!'

This is just an example of how fear talks, or to better put it, talks you out of your real essence, to love. Believe me, It knows how to get to its final, fatal blow: that of transforming you into a 'trade machine' ('I will not give you any of my feelings, unless you give me something in return') or even worse, in a useless knick-knack, incapable of acting or thinking for yourself. It will talk for you, act for you, think for you. It will become You, in the end. And nobody wants that. Do you?!

Love cannot lack. It is the essence of all things and beings. So stop being afraid of the fact that you do not have Love in your life. You do, and it is out there, since you slammed the door in its face, you closed yourself in, and left it out. Are you saying that it is better this way, since Love only made you suffer? Did Love make you suffer, or your choices? You put your heart on a silver platter and gave it to her/him and all that she/he did was to walk away and step all over your bleeding heart. It hurts, indeed, but it is not Love to be blamed. She/He was not the right choice, so keep trying, but this time, stop a little and listen to your heart. It knows and feels when it meets another heart that fits.

Or maybe you are one of those who say: 'I've been hurt so many times, that next time I won't love completely unless my feelings are corresponded.' Bravo! This is a good plan, a business transaction plan I mean. Love can neither be measured nor given in bits and pieces. Try this for a change: forget about the fear of being hurt, rejected. Why do you have to think of these in advance? Think of all those butterflies in the stomach, of all the strength and courage that loving unconditionally gives, of all that freedom that inebriates your winged heart. This is living, this is life! So what, if you get hurt? At least you loved fully, without fear, you gave to another soul the purest feeling that there exists. Never mind the possible hurt feelings. They are the other side of the coin. Turn it and remember the good parts so that, next time, you have the same courage and urge to love freely and completely. Staying in darkness will not help you or protect you, even if you think it does. It will destroy you, it will destroy your laughter, your joy, your trust in yourself and in others.

The fear of loving will make you feel miserable, will destroy in seconds future relationships and guess what, it will make you blind even when you have your soul-mate right there, in front of your eyes. It will not let you hear that her/his heart beats at one with yours.

Therefore, do not drive Love out of your life because you fear it will bring you only suffering. It does not! It brings bliss. What makes us suffer are our choices, our decisions, but never the fact that we loved.

Try to stay open and be ready for the two sides of a story of love: acceptance or rejection, forever-after or temporarily. When you will stop expecting and asking from Love, and start giving, everything will change. Be the first who gives and finds peace and joy in giving. Be like a soldier who, even if she/he has her/his war scars, she/he wears the medals proudly. And your medal will be a loving heart, even if it is imperfect because of its scars. You do not need a perfect monument of stone in your chest, but a warm, imperfect, beautiful heart, all wrapped in love, which enchants your days with its musical beating.

Do not be afraid of accepting love in your life. When It comes and knocks at your door, rush in and open. Be glad to welcome It in, live It fully, start the journey with a light heart, which is always content of being embraced by Love, and leave behind the heavy luggage of the past. It is the 'now' that matters, since it is up to you to make a difference and live It from a different perspective. Do not expect the worst to happen but live and love for the best.

Article Source: Websites Melbourne

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